A True Story About Elder Fraud

Where it Began: “The Honeymoon is Over”

My father was in a convalescent home.  When I’d visit my dad, he talked about his friend “Betty” that visited him often and brought him gifts.

When my dad entered hospice care, I decided to bring him home so he could be around family.  My dad told me his friend “Betty” was visiting.  “Betty” arrived in a Mercedes and was very young and pretty. Why would she want to visit my dad?

She came to visit quite often, and we would exchange normal pleasantries, which is when I found out that she worked at a local grocery store where my dad did his grocery shopping.

My dad had all his mental faculties but was taking a lot of morphine for pain management, in fact, I had jars of it. One day when I was talking with my dad, he told me he wanted to convert to a different religion and was thinking of getting married.  Okayyy ………that’s the morphine talking, right?

One day Betty was coming out of my dad’s room carrying an armload of my family framed pictures.  Pictures of Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, cousins.  Then it hit me, call it women’s intuition, she is up to something?  Why would she have my families’ photos?  So, I asked her, “Why do you have our family photos”.  She said, “I’m taking them home.”  I confronted her on the spot and said, “No you’re not.”  I took the photos back and said, “Get out and don’t ever come back”.

Whoa, for someone who hates confrontation, I took control of the situation. I knew in my heart of hearts that she was after my dad’s estate, and she was planning on marrying my father.  This is called a romance scam, predatory union, or sham marriage where the victim is not aware they are getting married.  These unions are legal and upheld in the court.

Don’t be afraid to confront someone if you think they are abusing an elderly person.  If Betty was visiting my dad as a caring friend, she would have discussed the matter with me when I questioned her about the pictures.  But she left with no further conversation, in fact, we never heard from her again.

After this experience, I started reading about financial elder abuse and talking to anyone that would listen to me.  Everyone had a story.  I continued my research and found out that financial elder abuse is an epidemic in the United States.